I watched in embarrassment/amusement/sadness, as my daughter leaned on the bare leg of a friend as she got herself up and then shocked by the feeling of smooth legs…she continued to stroke my friends leg for a while.

I knew of course that she was unused to this sensation…because body maintenance was not top, or even middle of my to-do list.

How do people do it…get up, straighten/blow dry hair, regularly shave legs, apply makeup in a way that enhances their looks, iron clothes, match accessories…I mean seriously where do they find the time. I have NEVER managed it, even pre baby-i just never found the time…I am not sure how I faff away my time but I always have.

And I don’t mind on the whole.

In fact I would advocate not doing any maintenance for a week before a big event/party/wedding…because then just washing, brushing your hair and shaving your legs makes you feel like you are a celebrity and your confidence will be sky high.

This approach which has served me well in the past, is now not so effective because a) I can have weeks of little-to-no body maintenance and not even notice :s and b) I cannot rely on the fact I will have the time to do it all on the morning of an event. Which basically leaves me half finished and a bit bedraggled and feeling more like ‘Oscar the Grouch’ than any celebrity.

I honestly believe for me self-care needs to look like self discipline, and things that I know will improve my mental health than a fresh hair cut. However, it doesn’t need to be either or-I can do the basics-not just so my daughter doesn’t obsessively stroke some ladies smooth legs but for me, so I feel a bit more sorted and confident.

Right now I am off to shave my legs…this is the only form of deforestation I support!