The conundrum of whether or not to remove hair? It’s a funny old world hair removal…the advertising is clever, it works from the assumption that of course it needs to be gone but as a woman you can feel empowered in the choice of how you choose to remove it!What joy! And what beautiful choices they are, a razor blade which is more than certainly going to give you a rash, waxing which isn’t particularly fun or hair removal cream which burns away the top of the hair just so you can enjoy ‘stubble’ a week later. It is an unsaid activity that comes with high stakes in the shame department-especially in the bikini line area!

Because if sex wasn’t vulnerable enough, or wearing a swimsuit not overwhelming lets throw in the joys of whether your bikini line is tip top.

It is something I give far too much thought to and if I have had a drink it is usually the topic I want to ask other women about…Forever the over sharer!

And we all know the stresses it can cause…when I was fairly heavily pregnant I decided to try and wax myself…lets just say I didn’t have the ability to maneouvre around my bump, and after much time in the bathroom, anxiety and pain, a hot shower to try and remove the wax that seemed stuck to me…I had achieved nothing except some massive bruises which my husband kindly pointed out looked worse than before!

But seriously when did it become the essential beauty regime to make you beach ready?

I mean truth be told I am pretty certain no-one can even see my bikini line, or is looking! Why do we stress so much about an area not a lot of people get to see. I felt body shamed by Jenny of Gogglebox fame (she lives in Hull and is always with her friend Lee) as she talked about how it was not nice that some women didn’t get a wax before their summer holidays. I genuinely think Jenny is wonderful, I have some concerns about some of the random items she purchases but she seems like a lovely lady, but what the heck Jen?!!! I mean seriously how many bikini lines actually are in your line of sight when on a beach and how much can hair offend anyone?

I am someone who obviously has got mildly sucked into some of these assumption-I have legit worried that I am making a statement with my body hair about being too conservative, and too liberal, a hippy or lack of adventure?!!! We have been so brainwashed into what is socially acceptable that the idea of body hair makes us feel ill- how did we come to care so much about hair?

I mean the magazines that magnify a picture so that every minuscule of a celebrity’s body can be analysed are not too helpful in this arena. But it’s more the infiltration into all areas of our societal norms that demands body perfection, when its rarely possible, and in reality rarely desirable.

I don’t think most people care-I think they worry more about the bigger issues in life, I think their desire to have sex usually outweighs whether they care whether you have had a Brazilian or not…and if it doesn’t they probably need to check themselves and regain some sense of priorities in their life. I honestly believe confidence is sexier than what you do with your body hair (but you know I am saying that as someone who hasn’t really experienced the world of topiary!)

If hair removal has become another reason why you won’t wear a swimming costume, or go to the beach or have sex that is not good. We shouldn’t let magazines and ridiculous cultural ideals dictate what we do and don’t do.

Don’t get me wrong if you love having a bikini wax and it makes you feel empowered-great! But if you just see it as another thing you need to do to enable you to be a desirable human then see this as permission to chuck those insane beauty standards and go and have some fun, whether you have embraced topiary or hairy!

Disclosure: I thought using the term topiary was funny and subtle but all I can think of is Edward Scissorhands-if I have inflicted the same image on you-so sorry!