I have been inspired lately to write, run, make space to reflect, pray, stretch, try new things, create…
But instead I have snacked, cried and watched TV (and hung out with Faith…because well that’s our life).
I am so frustrated that I can’t just do the things I long to. Even writing this blog entry…this is my 4th attempt. In the others I tried to be funny, reflective and insightful…well it ain’t working.
I am frustrated by the fact that my fringe, and my daughters for that matter, seems to have a life of its own and mainly seems to want to be a Diva. So will not submit to being brushed, pined or straightened down but instead sticks up and makes people think I am aiming for an Ace Ventura style.
Even my hair won’t play ball…
I have a million things on a want list going around my head, like well behaved hair, and yet I am so aware that Easter is coming up and it points to something more.
In many ways I still feel some disconnect with the deep faith filled memories I have of myself in past years. But at the same time I feel like things are shifting.
I am still in this waiting space, waiting for things to settle and to find my bearings but God is here and I feel more comfortable with the waiting.
I also feel confident that church is for people like us, for the doubters, questioners and those just holding on as well as for those who are vocally confident, the joyfully sure and those that are finding freedom and hope. We are all welcome here, God welcomes us all here.
Church isn’t for the sorted, its for all sorts.
(There is a liqourice joke to be had there but alas I cannot reach it, my mind is focussed on how do I get more half price Pic’n’mix from Wilkos whilst also wondering whether I will ever feel better about my body).