Oh Gabrielle you and your catchy tunes, that despite releasing that track when I was young enough to have it playing at the disco for Sylvanian families/barbies/any other toy (we were very inclusive) that we’d have at my friends house-I can still find myself singing it now, which is usually reserved for Whitney, Dolly and well a fair few randoms from the mid/late 90s (yes I am looking at you Hanson, Natalie Imbruglia, All Saints, The Honeyz, Cornershop and Eternal)
I have been thinking a lot about my dreams lately…am I where I hoped to be?
For a period of time in my teens, I wanted to be a lawyer, who wore a leather jacket and smoked…basically Demi Moore in Now and Then. I also had aspirations to be a journalist, teacher, NGO worker, events management, entrepreneur…and florist. I also briefly flirted with the notion that I would run a theme park, but that was solely down to the fact I loved to play ‘Theme Park’ on my friend Hayley’s sega mega drive. Thank the Lord-I didn’t ever get into that business I would have caused serious heath conditions but driving up the salt on my fries to dangerous limits just so I could sell more Cola.
I was always pretty confident…I didn’t ever worry that there wouldn’t be a job. Possibly over confident at times, I distinctly remember feeling at 16 years old like I was interviewing the employers too, as if there was a lot of choice for part time jobs in a small Somerset town and being a checkout girl was one of many options. There were no real other options!
Although the confidence was a born out of naivety, I do miss that feeling of ‘I am at the beginning of something optimism’.
And then I thought…
So I am soon to be 34 and a mum who stays at home, why can’t this be the beginning of something? Why can’t this be my fresh start?
All too often we give ourselves this ridiculous timeline, of what we want to achieve and by when.
But we can choose to start again at any age and stage.
This does not mean I am about to leave any of my current life-no need to fear I will still feed my addiction to crap TV (and the marriage and mothering malarkey).
But just trying to embrace all that is ahead and the possibilities of what could be.
Like you know…running (that is probably unlikely but maybe some form of exercise/fun). And maybe looking back at some of those childhood dreams and embracing some of the essence of it!